What a lovely rug! What's the fabric? Thank you, it's Golden Retriever.

I'd go get ice cream and watch Spongebob, but my executive functioning skills are diming and it's hard to actually plan and sequence what I need to do to get there. Besides, the kids left with their papa to go to piano lessons and I'd have no one to blame for turning on Spongebob but myself.

Okay. Pull ....self...together... mUST!

My dog is shedding large clumps of soft fur which carpet our house like a ubiquitous velour throw rug. I find clumps of it in corners, under beds, in our food, and weaved among the carpet fibers. It disgusts me. Even though when it's on his body I love to bury my head in his neck and smell the earth stuck in his fur. Have I mentioned lately how much I love my dog. Well. I do. It's insane how much I love my dog. I decided to pull out the big guns and defurminate the pooch. Special shampoos and a cleansing rinse (scientifically designed to loosen the hair follicle), a knubby bath scruber, a sham, the works. I even got a specialized de-furminator brush. I spend the whole evening on this task. At one point in my frenzy I launched a glob of defurminator into my left eyeball which means, I suppose, that I can cross growing hair on my eyeball off of my list of things to worry about. As for Toby... well, he IS clean. But as far as the fur goes, I think stopping this process, or encouraging it to follow my agenda is like asking my children to pee straight into the toilet without the oversplash onto the seat, walls, floor, mirror, window, hallway, adjoining bedroom, etc (depending on how long they've been holding it before making the frantic sprint to the toilet and their dance of contorted gyrations while pulling out their little pee sticks). Fur. Pee. It's all part of my life now.

I can tell the Zyrtec I took a while back is starting to kick in. My throat feels less tense and constricted. I think I heard a sigh deep down in my sinuses as something or someone just opened a canal. God how I hate and love drugs. I'd feel better if I was sucking on a mushroom, or licking an herb, or smearing insect guts on my nose....but I am too far removed from naturalistic medicine to even know what that would look like.

I think I may even go put laundry away and start dinner. After that, I'll scoop up a clump of dog hair and wipe off the toilet seat.